Saturday, April 18, 2009

Bye papa, mum!

Time now is 3.55am.

This marks the end of my parents' 3 months stay with us.

I'm missing them already.

There had been good and bad times for the past 3 months. We laugh over some jokes, argue over some matters, and then make up. It's been a long time since we had a relationship like we used to have.

Only difference is, I did not ensure their stay was as happy as they tried assuring me it's been. If only I could be more partial or respectful most of the times, they could have been happier.

End of the day, I'm disappointed with the way many situations turned out.

I can only say, I love my parents and am very very thankful that they've been doing their very best to ensure I need not have a hard time being sandwiched.

Our home has never been cleaner than now (or dirtier than it was in December. Face the fact.)

I feel really compelled to make a list of a hundred and one things that I've not been happy about or make comparisons between Mr Liow's mum's stay and my parents (I will but it will not be posted). I've been held bondage to this anger and it just keeps increasing whenever I recall the unfair distribution of respect. Things that can go wrong, will somehow go wrong.

Like Jonah, it's not easy believing someone actually deserved to be shown kindness of any sort, or be forgiveness, worse when that person just can't stop aking advantage of the kindess of others without even acknowledging that being a problem. I can't forget and I can't forgive. And I get increasingly angry with that disgusting behaviour. Worse when anyone who CAN put a stop to that disgusting behaviour, is encouraging it. This hurts.

I can't read minds but sometimes when people change, you notice it better in the company of others.

Mr Liow did his best to provide financially for my parents while they were with us and bring them around. For that, I am grateful.

As for other matters, the heart keeps dying over and over again...

I can't wait for be back in Singapore. I think this place is cursed.

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