Day 16: Recovered?

AN has not been having her fever medicine since the last time we gave it to her 37hrs ago. Her temperature remains under 37C.

She's also not been coughing as violently as she did before. There is still phlegm but she could cough them away now.

Gave her the antibiotics this morning and even though she was terribly against taking it, she did with some coaxing and almost no need to force it down her throat. Previous times, my mum had to hold her hands. Today, she laid down in my arms, sobbing that she didn't want the white medicine but tried her best to swallow the dose (I squirt the 3mls into her mouth 1ml at a time for her to take some water in between). She was brave! It must have tasted disgusting but I could tell she tried to keep the medicine down even though she gagged at the 1st ml.

She got one Hershey's kisses as a reward.

My brave girl. Hehe.

Colostrum

My colostrum came in abt 2-3 weeks before we shifted out of Sonoran Terrace.

The past time I had milk for AN, it was around 3rd month of my pregnancy. Nothing came out as I expressed but AN said she was getting some. Made me wonder if she just didn't want to be frank with me in case I take her off nursing.

The last time I tried expressing again, it was during the busy periods of packing. I noticed clear liquid.

Then I felt fuller breasts like I used to have when nursing AN full time during her first few months of life.

At 26th weeks now, my breasts feel less full and tight and once in a while, I do noticed AN swallowing as if she's drinking well when she nurses. Colostrum supply seems good at this point as I expressed my 'mem mems' to see how much I have now.

Not such a good idea to be expressing anything at this point since I almost had AN at 34th wk due to the fact that I tried to massage my nipples too much then (to prep them for AN's arrival so that it would be easier for her to latch on).

Then again, since I'm still nursig AN to sleep, the risk of boy's early arival plus history of delivering earlier, is still a call for attention.

I've calculated: since Dr Henry said history is very likely to repeat, I am expecting baby boy to arrive anytime from 8-11weeks time.

Fast right? This pregnancy seems to pass so fast.

Day 15: Recovery

AN's temperature went up to 39.6C again last night so Mr Liow suggested we feed her medicine at 1+am. Her next dose was supposed to be at 2am. She slept through the night after that. And as we took her temperature, it was kept below 39C after the dose of fever medicine.

Mr Liow was tossing and turning in bed. He was suffering from tummyache himself and busy rushing to and from the toilet. I was worried abou him too. This had better not be stomach flu. Thank God I saw him resting better by early morning but he was still waking up whenever I woke up to take AN's temperature. Maybe he wasn't feeling as well as I thought he was.

She had her Klacid at 8pm last night. That was her most feared medicines. She would open her mouth on her own even though she was whining about not having her medicines but with Klacid, she actually shut her teeth tight and spit out part of the 3mls. It must have tasted terrible as warned by Dr Tan. I could feel the grainy particles when she spat out part of it. Should have tasted like coarsely crushed panadol...it's no wonder when we woke her up at 1+am for fever and phlegm medicine, she was able to dreamily plead that we do not give her the 'white medicine'. She took the rest willingly when we assured her there wasn't to be any of the white medicine then.

She woke up near 10am this morning, had a little milk and then I had to force-feed her Klacid again while my mum held her down. She spat out some again and I gave a little more to make up that dose.Doses are to be 12hrs apart, so she's spared the agony till tonight.

AN asked to nap at 11.30am, barely 2 hrs after she woke up in the morning and did sleep till almost 2pm when she woke up for porridge. Was glad she had more than she did the last few days.

We did a bit of writing, watched a bit of YouTube, and she said she was sleepy again but was distracted by my parents who were enjoying chocolates. She couldn't have any, so she asked for raisins which I allowed her to have. My dad took her out for a short while to get newspapers and I thought I could bath her when she came back but she said she was sleepy again, so I'd probably bath her tonight.

The cheeky girl is in a slightly better mood than yesterday. She's giggling more towards the later part of the day. Before she slept, I repeatedly nagged jokingly about her being a stinko baby and so sticky. She giggled and purposely gave me a tight hug, sticking her sweaty face against mine (I took a quick shower before she came back and felt soooo clean and good!)

As she nursed for a nap at abt 4.30pm (her 2nd nap), she continued to giggle and press her sweaty arms all over my belly. The more disgusted I appeared to be, the happier her giggle was.

I'm happy to see her more cheery at that point. Very thankful too that her fever hasn't returned since the last time we fed her the fever meds at 1am. Praying that her fever will not come back. She's coughing less violently now as well. Praying too, that her cough is finally recovering. We are left with the antibiotics that she has to finish whether or not she's feeling better. I pray she will be more cooperative. Most of all, I pray the lung infection is clearing up fast and that everything inside will be back to norm real soon!

Mr Liow will be meeting the Stacco board guy at 6.30pm. Pray also that he will be able to give that guy a good idea of what we want and that the stucco guy will be able to produce a sample of what we want exactly or an even more impressive idea of our originally preferred design.

Day 14: Lung Infection

Mr Liow dropped us at Mt A's Kinderclinic this morning before going to work.

When the pharmacist called out AN's name to get info from me regarding the medications AN is currently on, I wasn't able to recall offhand. She looked at me like it was ridiculous of me to not know what I had been giving AN. My mistake to not have brought all those bottles of medicines even though instincts told me I should do that this morning.

I remembered paracetamol for fever and Dr Tan gave AN a dose to take while waiting for her turn. The pharmacist then told me I have to regularly give her the fever medicines (every 4-6 hourly). It's hard adjusting back now that I am a firm believer that fever is not a bad thing but I also agree that if giving medicines make AN feel more comfy, I should just give. Oh well...I'm just going to dose her according to instructions of the doctors here now that we're back. Do as Romans do.

Dr Tan checked and suspected AN had lung infections!! It was more serious than we thought. He arranged for AN to take an x-Ray and because I couldn't accompany her for the x-Ray, I was thankful my parents could. Thank God they came with us.

In States, Influenza (Flu) was treated based on symptoms (at least Dr Monica, before Dr Bean did nothing to test for Influenza when AN was still under her care). Here, AN was given a swab test and the results turned out negative: No flu.

2 more swabs samples were taken from AN's nose (from mucus?) to test for strep and something else. Can't remember too much info at that point and Dr Tan said he should be able to have the results by Wed or Thurs.

Her month long cough was not a cause for concern according to Dr Tan. He said we can do test to find out exactly what she's allergic to after we have settled this more serious issue.

He gave AN a stronger dose of fever medicine to be taken should her temperature exceed 39C and advised us to admit her if her temperature reaches 41C. I hope we do not need to.

Dr Tan prescribed Klyacid for the lung infection and advised that we stop the current one for the throat infection. So, AN is down to just 3 medicines (1 to clear her passageway, 1 for fever, and lastly, the antibiotics).

AN's behaving more active today than yesterday but she's still sleepy. She napped from 1-2pm, woke up when Mr Liow came home to check on her and asked to sleep again at about 4pm. She's asleep now.

Really am praying that she need nt be hospitalized at all for whatever reasons. Praying that her lungs will be cleared of the infection with Klacid.

I was glad Mr Liow came home. AN had been asking for him but he was not expected to be back till late tonight coz he was going to meet the contractor to get the tiles. She was so happy to hear his voice she sprung up in the middle of her nap, and she happily played with him. Daddy's girl. Hehe.

Was glad my parents were around just now too. Gave me lots of mental support. I just didn't want to tell them too much of what Dr Tan said because they, mum esp, will imagine the WORST scenerio. So I kept assuring them that everything is under control, which will be now that Dr Tan is in the picture.

I pray for healing.

Day 13: Fever again

The fever went down yesterday and we were more relaxed. Her cough is still bad though.

This morning, just when we thought she has recovered (except for her coughing), her fever came back. We went out for Tim Sum and I felt her temperature rising in the car as we travelled to the restaurant. 

I was supposed to meet the girls in the afternoon so thought we would drop by for a while to say hi at least. It's been 2 years since we met and I was hoping to catch up a little.

AN was very uncomfortable at Shirley's place. I could feel her body heat but she was still awake enough to eat raisins. She didn't want raisins when I offered it to her in the past but when one of the girls (was it Genevieve?) offered one to her, she took it and liked it. She finished a pack by herself and I was pleasantly surprised she was willing to share her last 2 pieces.

She was not keen on making friends with anyone today. I could feel her lethargy.

Took her home and she napped. She woke up at about 6pm but remained drowsy and drifted in and out of sleep. Asked for something to eat (must have been hungry....my poor baby...) so I gave her some porridge my mum made. Almost right after her meal, she fell asleep again.

She's not had any of her medicines since morning. I wanted her to take the major ones (antibiotics & fever) but she didnt want any so I didn't force her.

Her temperature is at 39.6C now. We were contemplating bringing her to A&E but decided not to. There should be others who are more in need of emergency care than AN (like Mr Liow who had to be rushed to A&E few years back because of his slip disc. He couldn't even breathe then but there were many others ahead of him who appeared fine...).

We've decided to bring her to Dr Terrence Tan tomorrow first thing in the morning to see if she could get to see him before his first patient with appointment comes in. 

Please pray with us that she will be fine. I'm praying her fever will not exceed 40C. This is one of the rare time her fever remained at above 39C. Am feeling very worried for her now...

Day 12: Home Expo

This is the first day of Home Expo at Singapore Expo and we went with my mum after lunch with my bro. Left BM at home with my dad.

Mum tried to help by pushing AN around so that we could do what we needed to do but AN wouldn't allow me out of her sight. In fact, she was bordering on bring rude to my mum by shouting at her sayin that she didn't want her...

AN is still difficult. She's beyond reason and has been rude these few days. I seriously have no idea what to do with her...and she's still coughing badly. For the whole of today, she's been coughing almost non-stop. It's hard talking to her nicely when she keeps coughing, worse when she is in need of discipline... I feel as if I am talking to myself while she coughs away. This poor girl.. I wonder if when she will recover. It's more than a month but her cough seems to have gotten worse these 2 days..

Since she was not allowing my mum to do anything for her (she would check to make sure my mum wasn't even pushing her stroller), mum left us to do her own shopping. I was thankful that mum out in effort and helped us for the first hour or so, till AN kept rejecting her.

Mr Liow got interested in a mattress by Simmons which was comfy and posture-appropriate at the same time. And given that the price seems to be a much better offer than Isaiah's from OM, we were really keen to place a deposit BUT we were glad we did not do that yet, because OM would not allow us to use the deposit on something else in their store. They strictly insisted that we weren't allowed to refund nor do xchanges -_______-"

We had to leave the fair for Liang Court to speak to our sales person face to face. It wasn't her fault that her boss didn't want to be flexible. It's only been 6 days and we had no idea Isaiah mattresses were made in China till the fair, and for that price, we were able to get a second from the top of Simmon's line of beddings.

Finally after much negotiating, her Boss allowed us to make that a deposit for a sofa that we had interest in since we stepped in on Monday. It was a costly set of sofa and we should be able to get something similar at the Home Expo for a fraction of the cost. Too bad then.. it's not a new lesson but a reminder NEVER to rush into placing huge deposits when we are not even pressed for time.

AN had another long day. Kids need routine but AN had none since we came back. I will not be surprised her crankiness and bad behaviour is a result of being neglected lately. Neglected and sick.. Poor baby. I really need to give her more attention instead of disciplining her so much lately. I'm not even filling her needs, yet I'm emptying her of whatever's left in her by shouting at her so much lately. I must remember she has a reason to behave as such when she's not usually this bad.

Bad mummy me... I feel so bad. Every night as I watch her rest, I'd feel so guilty I wasn't loving her as much as she deserves to be but comes daytime and tantrum starts (ESP lately), the impatience takes over.

I pray for a clear mind to see beyond AN's tantrums and boundless patience to teach her right from wrong..

Day 11: Sick AN = Cranky AN

We did not go out today as much as I wished I could. She seemed a little drowsy and had a slightly longer than usual nap. By early evening (7.30pm), she was asking to sleep.

I should know by now that she's crankier than usual when sick but having to actually go through those tantrums takes lots of patience. Understanding is not enough.

She got upset that I helped her put her stool back after she used it because she wanted to bring it back herself. She would usually ask nicely but not today: she got really upset and started crying loudly while repeating her intention. So as not to agitate her, I brought the stool back so that she could "do it" herself as she insisted but she stood there crying for a long time without doing what she said she wanted to do. I put it back and she got even more upset. Her cries and repeating of those words: "I want to do it myself!" made ne crazy... I gave her a chance to do it but she just stood there crying. Had to punish her for being so difficult.

2nd tantrum: Exactly the same with training pants for nap. She had lots of water so even though she already went to the toilet before nap, I got ready a pair of training pants for her in case she peed in her nap. She wanted to "do it myself" again after I have already took one out and started her tantrum again. Asked her to go get one more but she insisted I put mine back. I did and she stillstood there crying. Had to force her to change else I wonder when she will stop crying to finally have the nap she needed.

3rd tantrum: She wanted to write her name. Since we came back, she's nt been writing her name and has forgotten how to spell it. She seems to also have forgotten her number and alphabets... Oh no..

Since she was keen, I got her a pen and piece of paper to write on. She made wanted to write 'A' but the left stroke exceeded the narrow line of the notebook by a little. She wanted me to clear the stroke so that she could start again. I couldn't, coz it was a pen mark on paper. She got upset and started crying again while insisting she wanted me to erase that mark. She didn't want new paper. Argh!!!!!

4th tantrum: Taking her medicine had been a breeze this time. She drank her antibiotics, cough and phlegm syrups from a spoon willingly since we got back from the doctor. But for once out of the many times I fed her medicine since ytd, she decided to make life as cruel for me as possible, and refused to take her medicine. So so so much crying in a day, so much demands, so hard to appease her, so much defiance... I broke down... She didn't want anyone else to help her with anything but was not ready to obey me as well. I was at my wits' end with her...

Mr Liow finally managed to convince her to have her medicine. She was already coughing non-stop by then (shld hv been something from her dinner even though se had only 3 scoops of it...) and it had to take so much convincing. She's usually cooperative enough with some reasoning... Anyway, she finally took her cough and phlegm medicines and looked really really tired out. We went into the room to end the night early at 8plus.

That's end of a torturous day.. I pray she'll be back to normal by tomorrow in all areas from behaviour to health..

As for home Reno, Mr Liow met the contractor Ed recommended today and had some pretty good news. He is able to dismantle a ledge that Ed didn't think was possible coz of some details. We hope he's right about the job being less complex than it appears. If nothing goes wrong, permit will be applied on Monday (Permit to start hacking) and Mr Liow will meet him after work to order those tiles. Hacking and tiling should commence next Thursday.

I hope we'll get things done up soon. I asked Dr Henry about the chances of me delivering early and he said history is very likely to repeat. AN almost popped when I was in my 34th wk and finally did at 37th. I'm into my 26th week now and that means I have to be prepared to deliver anytime in 8-11th weeks time!! If boy comes in 8 weeks, our home will barely be ready coz our boxes will have only arrived couple of weeks before.

We commit these uncertainties to the Lord...I'm now feeling overwhelmed by these issues and AN's tantrums + her feeling so unwell..

I pray tomorrow will be a better day.

Baileys and Maen seems to be settling in fine. Maen peed on papers that my dad placed in the kitchen and Baileys peed in the toilet without papers. Either way is acceptable. I'll probably walk them more so that they can relieve themselves outdoor. As for poop, other than Maen's classic "stop to poop in the middle of the ROAD" episode, they've never once done that outside. It's ok, as long as they know it's papers or toilet they have to go to when the urge comes.

Day 10: AN is down

We were expecting ourselves to fall sick last week, right after arriving Singapore. Most, if not all of Mr Liow's colleagues who came back would be down with fever or be sick with something.

AN had already been coughing since the girls came over to Tucson on 12th May but because it was common then (people were coughing everywhere due to allergies), Dr Bean assured us it was nothing to worry about.

She is still coughing now and that means she's been coughing for more than 4 weeks. And finally since we came back from my MIL's place on Tues, her body temperaure went up.

She shivered in her sleep last night and her temperature went up to 39.1C and that worried us a lot. I had my first Gynae appointment this morning with Dr Henry Cheng and thought we would bring her to a baby doctor after that. Was glad to see one baby and kids' clinic few stores away from Dr Henry's clinic so while I waited to see my doctor, Mr Liow took AN to hers.

We chose convenience over Dr Terrence Tan. For common toddler ailments, any GP SHOULD be able to help, let alone a PD. Not such a good idea. According to Mr Liow, when the Dr needed AN to open her mouth to check her throat, he got a nurse and Mr Liow to hold AN's limb and forced her teeth apart with a stick!! That scared her to tears of course! Even my dad's first reaction when he heard that was:" Didnt she cry?" She did. Who wouldn't?

Dr Bean never fails to get AN to open her mouth willingly. The Florida Dr we took AN to when she had spots due to allergies, also got her to do it by herself. I am very super duper confident Dr Terrence Tan would have also try to gain AN's trust before getting her to show him her throat on her own. And there should be toys to distract the kiddos in a baby and kids' clinic, should there not? Mr Liow said there was none.

She was given FIVE medicines to take!!!! HUH?? Antibiotics for throat infection, fever, runny nose, phlegm and cough. I thought phlegm and cough should be a mixture into one syrup so that we do not scare the young ones into having to take FIVE medicines at a time?

Anyway, I will only be givin her the antibiotics to clear the infection and the cough syrup. She's not having runny nose so I will not be giving her that. Fever is going to help fight the infection so I'll only feed her the fever medicine at night. Effectively, we paid $75 for 2 medicines out of 5 and consultation for specialist but got not expertise as charged. Hmm..

Now back to Gyna appointment, we were happy to see Dr Henry today. He's so nice and warm like before. We got many pictures of our boy today, and measurements in a file. Will have to bring my Gyna records from previous visits in the States for him at our next visit so that he can check the boy's growth. As of today, boy is in Breech position but Dr Henry assured us that in most cases, because foetuses are "top heavy", they should turn head down to prepare for birth. He described the experience as feeling lots of movements all of a sudden as if something major is going on inside my tummy when boy turns upside down. That's new to me coz I had never felt AN turn like he described. Hehe.

I asked about boys being lower in the womb and he said it wasn't true. I thought I felt this pregnancy was different because I feel the weight lower than when I was expecting a girl. Dr Henry said second and subsquent pregnancies will also feel lower than first because all our muscles and loosened, regardless of baby's gender. Ok, so I had a goof guess about baby boy this time, not because he is indeed lower than AN used to be.

Part 3 of today, we went to meet Edwin. AN was better this afternoon after a nap so I took her to Fernvale where Mr Liow was in a discussion with Edwin. I shouldn't have because she should be resting. Now, she's super tired and her fever went back up again. Her face is all red and flushed and hot and her eyes were red and Geary before she fell asleep short while ago.

Anyway, because we had no time to lose and Edwin has too much on hand to care for, he decided not to take up our Reno but promised to help us out of goodwill. That means we will have to do our own coordination but he will help advise us on designs and colours etc. We feel bad that he will not be charging us anything even though he will still be helping us. Only difference is, his commitment level to our Reno will be minimum. He could have washed his hands off and leave us to call some contacts he gave us but he went with us to select tiles and will go around with us to choose accessories when he can, next week.

So we will be doing our own coordination. Mr Liow will be working from Monday and for a start (possibly for as long as he's with RSAF), he'll be busy. I pray that I will be able to help coordinate so that he need not feel stressed up with catching up at work and rushing to get our home ready in time for the arrival of our cartons.

BM will be home tomorrow. We miss them. AN misses them for sure coz she assumes we are going to bring them back on most days we go out this past week. She would tell my parents before we leave: "We're going to bring BAILEYS AND MAEN HOME!"

We finally are going to do that tomorrow. I will stay at home with AN tomorrow so that she can rst. Mr Liow will be meeting a contactor recommended by Edwin to discuss about tiling and some other works. That will be after he checks the furkids out of Sembawang Chalet.

Poor AN looked so sick just now that I couldn't help blame myself for bringing her out bfore she even recovered. Her body temperature felt sooooooo hit against ke as I Carrie her just now while selecting tiles. And she even missed dinner because we were rushing. I should have gone home with her while the guys went for tiles selection.. :( Bad mummy..

I pray that AN will feel better tomorrow. I think she will brighten up when she sees the furkids. Hehe. They will definitely need to be showered tomorrow. Hope I'll have time to freshen them up (I will have to by hook or by crook..I'm sure they will njoy feeling clean again).

Sorry Sunflower, I really could go down to the quarantine centre to see how it's like. Been so busy with things..but I'll update on how clean or dirty they look, if they come back with ticks (hopefully NOT!!) or if they have bad skin conditions that they did not alreaDy have.

Day 9: Missing home

How I wish we can move back home soon..

Even though my parents and MIL welcomes us to stay with them, it will never be as comfortable as our own home. Baileys and Maen will be back on 25th (2days from now). My parents enjoy a super clean home and I foresee conflicts (I have low tolerance for repeated nagging about how much they shed etc).

Mr Liow suggested going to stay with his mum coz they have a maid and his mum is more receptive towards dogs. But there's no bed in his room so we have to get one. Now, if we do shift to his mum's place, it'll take some explaining to my parents and I'm worried my dad will blame my mum for making us feel unwelcome (coz of her wierd behaviour days back) or mum might think we're not happy with her or something... It doesn't feel right either way.

Frankly, if I had to compare now, my MIL is easier to get along with than my own mum. It's unbelievable that I'm thinking this, I know. But after coming back, so many things have changed. My MIL is much more reflective on her own behaviour now as compared to the past, and she listens to us. She's so much more cheerful than she used to be and is positive about most things. I feel encouraged after an informal chit chat session. Of course she's not perfect and she has values that she held firmly to over her nearly 60 yrs of life. It's like a burnt-in effect and to see these changes in her over just 2 yrs, it is already a miracle, to be frank.

Mum on the other hand always assumes she's right about everything and doesn't listen at all. No, not at all. There's no way of talking to her peacefully. It's bound to end up in either an arguement, or we have to keep quiet even if we do not agree, just so that she doesn't go crazy again. This was my MIL in the past. Now it's my mum.

In case I'm giving u guys the wrong idea that situation at my parents place is still strained, rest assured things are back to normal now. Mum just made lunch for us whcih we had at 10am. To maintain peace and order, we ate, even though Mr Liow was craving something that's not porridge. Thanks for tolerating along with me dear..AN was obviously not ready for porridge soooo early and wasn't happy when I made her eat. Mum thinks AN is being very naughty today. She doesn't understand it's just not AN's timing and even when I told her that, she said "other kids" eat porridge at this time. I don know about other kids but mine doesn't and it's unfair I force her to become like "other kids".

So, it's really hard to decide. Home is still best. We do not have to answer to anyone, we do as we please, enter and leave as we wish. We do not have to feel embarrassed about mess, dirt or fur. It's not so much a matter of staying with who, but a matter of doing as Romans does: I have to ensure the room we are sleeping in now remains the same condition it was when we first stepped in, make sure AN doesn't dirty the place and over at my MIL's, there are other 'house rules' that we are currently unsure of yet.

What should we do? Shift out or remain after BM comes back from quarantine?

Does it sound diplomatic enough if we shift out now for, maybe 3 weeks and then come back to my parents place for the last 3 weeks? Our home should be ready by then, hopefully.

I was so desperate I suggested we clean up FERNVALE LANE and shift in so that we have less to worry about. Baileys and Maen have all the freedom to roam as they please, we have the freedom to come and go as we like as well.

Any suggestions??

Day 8: Meeting our Designer Part I, Settled BM's license

I think we went to meet him with too high expectations and was a little disappointed with what he had to propose. There was no quotations or drawings to see, only a proposed layout plan. Not all designers are the same, so we should not compare. Praying that we'll have more to see in the next few days.

We took AN to MIL's place to play with the girls before we left to meet Edwin. AN asked if she could stay there with them when I said we were leaving. That was our intention and I was glad she wanted to stay too. But as expected, when she wanted to pee, she wanted me to do it for her but we were already halfway through discussion with Edwin by then. She refused to let MIL put her on the potty and ended up wetting herself. MIL washd her bottom but AN refused to let MIL put new shorts on and we had to rush back so that I could put her pants back on for her

-_____-"

We decided to take her out with us to meet Edwin right after that so that we didn't have to rush back the next time she asked for me.

Bad news... What's going to happen when I go deliver baby no. 2?

I told her I will have to be away for a few days when baby wants to come out and she said I can come back after that to help her. Erm...uh-oh..

She seems to be having a fever but we're not sure. She feels warm at the neck and palms but not elsewhere (limbs, head, back, ears, face etc felt normal). Took her temperture when we got home and she was 38.4C. Praying that she will not fall sick these few days. We have to catch up with Edwin as often as possible before Mr Liow goes back to work next week and we are really hoping to get the Reno started by July 1st. She has a fever patch on now, and very comfortably dressed to cool her off. Seriously, she didn't feel very warm to touch, very unlike 38.4C.

Anyway, AN is starting to speak Mandarin without us teaching her to. She told me "mei you le" (no more), pointing to empty stalks of grapes. Took me a while to understand her even though I heard her loud and clear. I just didn't expect her to say that in mandarin.

She also told me she wanted "ji ge" grape (one grape) when we were talking to Edwin. Stunned me for a while and I stared blankly at her before she broke the awkward silence between us: "Mummy, can I have a grape? Yi ge."

And before she slept, she patted the pillow I had been sleeping on and told me: "Wo de". I tried not to think too hard this time and understood her. She meant the pillow was hers. Then she smiled and said she will share the pillow with me, in English.

It's amazing how fast kids pick up languages.

That's about all for today. Praying that AN will be well by tomorrow. Else we have to figure out a way to leave her home without her pining for me else Mr Liow will have to decide on everything by himself tomorrow.

Updated 0:08am
Went to AVA in Pasir Panjang to apply for Baileys and Maen's dog licens. DONE! Both are legal again. The new license does not come with a dog tag anymore. The piece of paper is proof of their license, together with a microchip.

So cheapo...last time we still get dog tags for $14 each. Now it's just a piece of paper for the same price. Oh well, at least this is settled. The furkids will be due for release on 25th June but payment has to be made a day before. They are required to be licensed before we can make payment on Thursday, and before they will allow us to bring BM home.

Basically, AVA intends to squeeze as much out of us as possible before we can bring them back.

Grrr...

But nevermind. As long as they leave us alone after everything.

Postponed

Sigh...

We're supposed to meet Edwin today but it's changed to tomorrow. Bro got a TV to be delivered today and we had the delivery date shifted ill tomorrow because I thought I could be home tomorrow but now we have to get the delivery date changed again.

Maybe we should just meet Edwin on Wednesday. Easier right? Than to have the delivery date changed a second time...

Mr Liow went back to the office, supposedly to bring some stuff in and meet his friends for breakfast. He said he should be back by 11am. Time now it 1.18pm. There's no way of getting him (welcome back to no-reception-in-RSAF-base!!!!). He called once to let me know the time to meet Edwin has been changed but before he could say anything else, the line got cut off and now I don't even know what's going to happen next...

Really a test of patience. 

He's already stuck in the office before he's officially starting work (next Monday). I think I can expect worse from monday onwards..

Welcome us back to Singapore and reality!

Day 7: Mom took AN out..

Mum just took AN out. AN wanted to follow her so I let her go. I do not feel good about letting AN go with mum this time unlike any other times. Mum had been behaving wierd the past 2 days. She went out early, came home real late and refused to speak to anyone, including AN. AN called her many many times and she refused to even look at the little girl and even when she did, she GLARED at AN!! That was after I call out loudly to her (giving her the benefit of doubt that she didn't hear AN calling out to her) before she would turn in AN's direction but she would not respond to AN's questions or attempts to hug her. The only time mum spoke to me yesterday, it was to tell me off for trying to 'meddle in her affairs'. That was her respond to my questions: "Mum, have you eaten?" 

I got super pissed off and replied her in a less than respectful tone that I was just asking and being concerned and that everyone in the family didn't have to bear with her nonsense but everyone did. Dad didn't even dare to make much noise at night when she locked herself in the room in case she was sleeping and she's a super light sleeper who is unable to sleep unless it's totally quiet, which is impossible in a HDB flat with so many neighbours and now a 3 year old...Dad kept reminding AN not to speak too loudly so that mum can rest well. See how sweet my dad is to her??? I don't understand my mum's negativity towards my father at all, not a single bit..

It all started with that little disagreement 2 days ago and she behaved like everyone in the family (every single one of us, even my brother who wasn't even home when it happened) offended her since then.

She finally opened up this morning and started talking to me and AN (not with my dad though, and both Mr Liow and bro are at work so I don't know if she will talk to them later on in the evening). She was preparing to leave the house to meet my aunt and AN wanted to follow her. I couldn't say no. If AN can open my mum up, I'm more than willing to let AN do it.

But I'm worried that the reason my mum got so upset, wasn't simply because of the arguement. I was worried mum could be suffering from some old people illness that I'm not aware of and now feeling jittery that she will lose AN (forget that she brought AN out), or suddenly feel enraged over the arguement 2 days ago and come back without AN to spite us. Trust me, if you have seen her behaviour the last 2 days, you will be worrying about this same thing as i'm worried about now.

I don't know why my mum has turned into such a scary person but she has. My brother said it's normal she flies into a temper over simple issues (like him not being able to take her to the temple even though it was near his workplace because time was running tight for him and she only told him at the last minute she needed a ride from him etc) and she will remain angry (bang the doors whenever she's home, glare at whoever's home, refuse to speak and stays out the whole day till late into the night) for the few days after.

I wonder if I'm putting AN's life in danger by allowing her to go out with my mum without me following them now. Am I doing the wrong thing by allowing my daughter to maintain peace in the family? I'm feeling more and more like I just sent AN onto the sacrifice altar now as I'm typing. Maybe I should have waited till mum's cooled off more before I allow AN to go out with her. She could still be VERY angry since I just told her off yesterday for not appreciating everyone's concern. 

Oh no....I just don't feel right...I feel like crying now... :( I am going to give mum a call now and pretend to ask if AN's behaving....Stupid me....why did I allow her to bring AN out alone????

Day 6: Shopping for the house

We were out for Mr Liow's cousin's son's 1st year birthday party in the afternoon and after sending my MIL back to my SIL's place, we went window shopping for our place. There was no intention to get anything but...it was hard to resist.

We bought a bedframe (have upgraded our bed to King sized in anticipation that both human pups will squeeze with us after the arrival of our little boy) but are still keen to put both of them in their own room, away from us ultimately. This is the bedframe we chose. There's storage under the mattress and 2 drawers at the front, or side as we wish. To decide later). The frame and headboard will be in fabric instead of PVC in this picture. Colour will be selected at a later date.

Day 4: Staying Home + Toy Story 3

My parents aren't educated or well to do and have only enough to spend on food and an occassional escape to Malaysia (for mum. Dad rather stays at home).

Now that we are grown ups and have earning power to spend, bro decided to get them a new TV coz the one they have now is no longer working properly (picture is distorted) but as he expected, my parents were not happy that he bought a new TV even though he meant well. -_________-". Dad's strongly negative reaction was discouraging but guess bro is used to it. Dad askd him to put the new TV in his own room (42" in a tiny room??? It was just to spite my bro, for some wierd reasons).

Took almost an hour of explaining to my dad that even if he could get this old TV fixed for this problem, we cannot be sure there will not be problems with other TV parts. Its afterall a 6 yrs old TV and repair cost is very likely to exceed the cost of this new TV because u never know how much repairs to this old TV we have to make to get it operating normally for long enough. The new TV has a 3 yr warranty period, by the way.

So he finally agreed and arranged for the new TV to replace another old TV on their console (there are now 2 old TVS and one doesn't work at all but they couldn't bear to dump it for the past 2 yrs).

Mum was the same this morning when dad told her bro got a new TV which will be sent on Monday. She blamed bro for spending unnecessarily and I had to spend another hour explaining to her the same thing -____-"

Then when dad realised there will not be anyone at home on Mon to receive the TV other than himself, he got grumpy and insisted he will not understand when the technicians teach him how to use the remote controller, even though we told him he need not understand coz we will know how to use it. TV controllers are all the same... but he wasn't ready to accept it and insisted my bro arrange to be home. We will not be able to because we will be meeting Edwin to discuss the details of our Reno, and mum stubbornly refuse to be at home even though she need not have to go out at all... Wah...kaoz.... It's hard to please 2 old and stubborn people.

Mum promised to bring AN out if it didn't rain but also made my dad stay at home for lunch. Dad liked to lunch out but coz mum said she will be cooking for AN anyway, he stayed home. Jus because Mr Liow casually asked if mum would be taking AN out (so that we can plan to settle some admin issues for ourselves) and mum said yes, dad assumed mum decided not to cook and he got upset. Mum too got upset because she DID intend to cook but it was too early to, besides dad had breakfast not less than an hour ago.

It was a case of miscommunication but then again, my parents never communicated. Everyday, there'll be frictions due to misunderstood intentions and then everyone will be unhappy.

Now porridge is ready and mum is hiding in the room to spite dad (and maybe me because I simply said they should talk to each other and she thinks I'm siding my dad.......). Nothing else, except porridge. So is this lunch, or...? Mum came out to tell dad off for hurrying her into making lunch and told him to go eat since he was 'hungry' so early (dad wasn't hungry when they had that arguement. He only thought she decided not to cook after she made him stay home when he wanted to go out.)

Dad silently sprinkled soya sauce on his porridge and said it was ok and that they eat very simply for lunch. I asked Mr Liow to pack some dishes back but my dad decided plain porridge was good enough. Erm...

AN can have her pork/fish/chicken floss with the porridge but I would prefer in addition. Before we came back, mum kept assuming I wasn't feeding AN well and said she will make good food for AN but this is the second day of lunch consisting of porridge with porkfloss and anchovies... How about other nutrients to make up a balanced diet? I rather AN eat out if that's the case. At least she has a variety of food for each meal even though it's healthier (less seasoning and unhealthy oil) eating home cooked food.

Wierd family I have, right? I'd like to just attribute these negative thoughts about them to the fact that they are uneducated and have not seen much of the outside world.

I miss going back to our own home now. At least I dun hv to be stuck in the middle of their squabbles or be thought to take sides when I do not..

Am just praying for wisdom to help ease the frequent tensions. It's been like that since we were young but having to go through this again after being away for so long (since we got married in 2004), it just feels wierd and frankly, not very pleasant.

And then, will AN watch and become as quarrelsome?

Sigh... Dunno la. One step at a time.

Toy Story 3
Since popo left the house without keeping her word to bring AN out, we did.

We've been wanting to bring AN for movies since ages ago but haven't had the opportunity to: there were not many shows for her.

Since she loves Toy Story and Shrek (which both are showing now), we decided to bring her to one first.

She totally enjoyed herself! She snacked on popcorn, sweetcorn and sweet peanuts, exactly what Mr Liow and I used to snack on when it was just the 2 of us. She managed to get in for free this time but we doubt she'll get in free the next time round. The young lady closed an eye to AN's height coz AN was exactly 90cm according to their measurement chart.

Toy Story 3 was good! In fact, all 3 of us agreed that this sequel is the best among the 3!

It was fun bringing AN this time. We'll try bring her for Shrek soon, before Mr Liow starts work. Hehe.

Day 3: Driving License Converted!

Like we did the past 2 mornings, we woke up at about 6am, tossed and turned a little till about 7.30am and then woke up feeling extremely hungry. So, we went out for breakfast!

AN and I shared a plate of mushroom noodles (mee kia in simple dark sauce) and Mr Liow had char siew wonton noodles. AN had a surprisingly huge appetite and finished almost half of my noodles and since Mr Liow was craving for something more than wonton noodles, he got us another bowl of lor mee to share. How not to put on weight? In fact, Mr Liow already noticed that I'm fleshier now! I don't know if it's coz I kept eating since we got back, or if it's just pregnancy weight gain. I feel my toe ring lately and when I look, they look tight!! Once upon a time, they were so loose I could turn them around those 2 toes and had to make sure they didn't fall off. Am I not realizing I have grown fat??

Some people say hormones change more if a mum is expcting a boy, and the mum goes through lots of changes during pregnancy. Some become...less than attractive. I think I am one of those. AN made me feel good and I think I had what some call the 'pregnancy glow'. Not with this one!

Uh-oh.. Hehe.

Mr Liow and I felt more tired today than the past 2 days and took a nap. My mum brought AN to Compasspoint while we slept. When they came home, AN excitedly told us that popo bought her 'bah hoo' (pork floss). Mum got pork, fish and chicken floss for her little princess but guess what this princess told us? "Popo got me bah hoo but only very little"

-______-"

Told her popo bought her varieties and she should be thankful, so she went out to say thanks to popo.

She was tired too by noon and asked to rest, so I laid down bside her. In less than a minute, she was out.

Mr Liow and I then left quietly for Ubi Driving Centre to have my foreign driving license converted.

I tried driving Mr Liow's 'Wish' but gave up after we exited the multi-storey carpark. The road inside HDB estates is ridiculously narrow!! We both agree that the width of that one road which allows 2 cars travelling different directions here is the same as that one road that allows only 1 direction in Sonoran Terrace!! I keep looking into the side mirror to make sure I do not drive onto the kerb... Oh my goodness... I need LOTS of practises!!

One common thing that happens when one adjusts to driving back here is, we keep activating the wiper when our intention is to actually signal 'left' or 'right'. Hehe.

So, anyway, I almost couldn't get my license converted. It was not made known in their regulations but the foreign license has to show a validity of 1 year and I only renewed mine in April (coz of Mr Liow's extension in Tucson) which expires in Dec 2010. That's only 8 months. Even with Mr Liow's ITO which clearly shows the extension, the staff insisted we had to bring my previous license.

I can only produce that license when our boxes arrive in august. Who would have thought a valid license that's not expired is NOT good enough. So PV ladies reading this, have all your driving licenses with you in your wallet, and also your passport and ITO to bring to the driving centre if you need to convert your driving license. And Basic Theory has to be passed too (thanks God they still have my data in the computer, else I'll definitely need to retake my basic theory coz I lost all proof that I've passed it).

After some haggling, the lady agreed to give me my license, on the condition that we fax her my first Arizona license the moment I get it back.

I'm now legally allowed to operate class "3" vehicles, YEAH!! Mr Liow kept smiling coz if I were to take lessons and test/s here, chances are, it will take me forever to get this license (not to mention the thousands of S$ we'll be spending). It took me from 2002 since I passed my basic theory till before we left Tucson and I had not even started taking driving lessons.

And it took me only 2 days of 3 hrs' lesson each to get me my license to drive in Tucson.

License will arrive in about a month and I'll be on a year probation. Hehe.

The girls came over for dinner and we went shopping after that. Bro got a TV for me parents (for some reasons, TV at my parents' place keeps failing after warranty) and we spent some time walking through the mall. AN got to make a picture with coloured sand while 5 adults watched on.

AN is happy to be back. She's enjoying EVERY bit of attention she's getting from family here. She dances and everyone wAtches. She's loving it. Hee.

Oh yes, I finally had my haircut yesterday!! No more long, entangled hair!!

Extreme Makeover

I have to xpect that our home will be much less than new after being rented out for 2 years but it's still sad to see the condition it's now in :(

The shelves in our fridge have mould (disgusting!!), the washing machine is also mouldy (and stinks!! The latest tenants washed their clothes before they left 3 months ago and closed it back, leaving vapour inside to turn into mould (argh....), the walls are dirty (wear and tear.. But it's still sad u know...) and the parquet floorings are all sticky and damp (what to do? Singapore is that humid and the house has been left empty for 3 months now). Oh, either the first or second tenant lost (or damaged) one of the remote controller to our aircon and gave us an old replacement that's not of the same brand. They were supposed to do half yearly servicing for our aircon units but I noticed the aircons did not look like they were clean (whenever our maintenance technicians came, they would also clean the 4 units).

The silicon that seals the sink in the kitchen has turned black (for 4 yrs, I've dried them after every use and they remain transparent and clean..I know I can't expect our tenants to do the same.) Our cooker hob is also dirty, stained and .... just not shiny anymore..

We have returned our Sonoran Terrace home to the management in the exact condition we received from them 2 years ago and it is sad to see that our tenants were not ready to do the same. Sigh...

So, instead of only changing floor tiles and revamping the 2 toilets as initially planned, we have decided to spend more to give the house a major makeover.

Gone with the dirty sink and hob. We met our designer (more on him later) at our place and he recommended induction cooker which sounded attractive given that it's safer and easier to clean. We are still changing the floor tiles and toilets, now also changing the kitchen sink (getting a bigger one this time. The old one was too small to wash bigger pots which we should be using more of now that our family is growing). The ID also agreed to help us polish our kitchen top, revarnish every piece of wood in the house (that's already rundown from wear and tear), also our parquet etc. Basically, at the end of the reno, it should be as good as it used to be 2 years ago, or even better.

We are adding grilles too, for the safety of the kiddos and the ID recommended this supposedly new grilles called Legate, Invisible Grilles. Perfect, as long as the grilles serve the purpose it is for and does not obstruct light from coming in.

The washer has to go (it's only capable of 4.5kg and we have larger loads to be washd now too. The condition it is in now makes it easier for us to agree to having it changed). Fridge will remain (Mr Liow still loves this fridge and it is really a good one.. We probably only need to have the magnetic strip changed and have it properly cleaned up).

Given the scale of things to be done and amount of hacking, Reno may likely stretch into August till after out boxes come back. It's going to be a big problem by then. Are praying for things to fall into place.

And guess what? Our ID is a friend! Mr Liow talked to him over the phone and didn't know it was someone we knew (who would expect Sgp to be small as such?). The moment he opened the door when we heard the knock, it was a surprise!

It was Edwin Pang! From SHSS!

He impressed me with his detail-mindedness as we walked through the discussion and how well he knew products (old and new). And he had many many ideas to suggest. So cool!

I can't wait to see what he will be comin up with. He hoped to get things moving by July 1st (and needs these remaining weeks to come up with plans and finalize details with us).

Mr Liow will not be working till 28th June, so we hope to be as productive as possible till then before he gets busy.

End of our day 2 activity report. Hehe.

Home Sweet Home!

We're back in Singapore!!

BR0225 touched down near 12pm Singapore time and the Lord blessed us with nice weather! It rained before we reached so the temperaure was at 29C. Other than the humidity, it was not a very hot day.

After the hugging and 'hi-s' at Changi Airport, we went immediately to AVA at Changi to settle Baileys and Maen.

I was sooooo happy to see them!! They were in an aircon room that was of a nice temperature with food and water and a raised platform which probably was for them to sleep on but they pooped on it. The rest of the room was clean. Their crates were clean too and they looks so happy and refreshed, a far cry from how they looked when they arrived at USA 2 years ago. They will be transported to Sembawang Quarantine Centre today and we should be able to visit them by this evening.

AVA was closed when we arrived so in the meantime before we met the furkids up, we went for HAWKER FOOD!!

I finishd almost the whole plate of fried hokkien mee that Mr Liow ordered for $5 (supposedly a larger portion but I didn't feel full even after finishing it! Mr Liow took only a couple of scoops and my family didn't touch any. My appetite has increased over the 2 years!)

we came home to rest a little and then headed off to Tampine Mall to have our Singapore numbers reactivated. We are contactable again! The numbers remain the same (mine ending with 7714 and Mr Liow's 8958).

AN couldn't wake up in the evening (almost) but did when we reached the mall. Had dinner there too.

Thank God we all managed to sleep well last night. We had intermittent sleep in the night but thank God AN did not wake me up when she couldn't sleep. In fact she whispered in my ears, patted me on my shoulders and asked me to go back to sleep.

We are all awake now! Couldn't go back to bed since 7am so Mr Liow went to get Fried Noodles for us. Having breakfast now.

Will go searching for a Reno contractor later in the afternoon. Hope to have some good news so we can get the house redone in time before boxes come back. More updates later!

Just Get Used to It and My Perfect Angels

AN fell from the chair this morning during breakfast. She kept fidgetting while having breakfast and as warned, she had to feel the pain to remember to obey. What was I doing when she fell? I was cleaning up myself because she spilled orange juice on me.

When my daughter fell, granny was making coffee and when she saw AN fall, she loudly shouted at me asking: "How did she fall? How have you been looking after her?"

Erm...I wasn't actually looking after my own daughter. I pushed my daughter off her seat so that she will knock her head on the floor in actual fact. What was that shouting at me for in front of everyone else in the breakfast area? To make me look like an incompetent mum? Like as if my heart did not hurt when I saw my daughter fall and knock her head against solid floor! Have I ever made her feel bad when AN fell twice in her care during AN's 1st year? AN's gums even bled once when she knocked her face against our coffee table coz granny was glued to the TV.

But when Mr Liow came back (he went to check on BM whom we left in the room by themselves. They were PERFECT! hehe. Pooped and peed in the toilet as usual and made no noises in our absence. The breakfast area was within hearing range and we heard no barks at all. My darlings!), she then gently went: "oh, it was an accident. It's ok la."

How fake.

Immediately after breakfast, we headed to Dessert Hill again because Empress Dowager needed to continue shopping. I had a tummyache on the way there but decided not to stop halfway through the travelling because I could wait. Yet the moment we reached the outlet, mother and son left for shopping!! Good! I was holding a sleeping AN and having a tummyache! Mr Liow said he would wait for her in the car initially but she wanted military discount so he had to follow her. And then, they left.

Despite me protesting to another burden, aka a new BRANDED luggage, she got what she wanted. The mini van is filled with existing 5 luggages and 2 crates. Now she wants another one. When she came the first time, she bought so much stuff that we almost had trouble bringing back to Tucson and I had to carry AN and sit in a car PACKED with things because she even needed AN's carseat to place her loot. I got to feel how it will feel like to be nailed in a coffin, alive. It was that packed and I hated how it felt then. When I saw then getting the luggage despite my protest, my blood boiled.

Mr Liow not care about how I feel at all despite me repeating myself. Mum got her Burberry, Polo Ralph, another Coach bag and a Samsonite luggage.

Why is he ALWAYS giving in to her?? And I had to bear with my tummyache as they shopped because my hubby didn't hear my more than 10 phone calls for help. I am not going through another caustrophobic experience again. I will not!! Do not expect me to sit beside those luggages or Baileys and Maen to have to sit on the floor to the airport, even if it is for only 15 mins. If there will be no space, WHY GET ANOTHER LUGGAGE?? Not as if she needed it. She just WANTS another branded luggage at a fraction of the cost, at the expense of fellow passengers, like she did before and forever will.

I hated how things never seem to change. He assures me that he is in control and I trusted him. But he's ultimately her puppet afterall. Mum's word is his order.

He apologised for not picking up my calls because he didn't hear the phone ring. I am sorry too, that he is his mum's permanent puppet and I married him to be Mrs Puppet. He said it's hard for him to say anything. I told him I will not make it hard for him because I will not shout at his mother like he did to my dad. I will not take revenge, but it's not easy to forgive, let alone forget. I will bear with it for his sake. How was it that it was so easy for him to speak his mind with my parents and be able to say no so easily, yet not so with his mum?

Things cooled off by afternoon and we started talking again. No, I hated to be taken for granted. His mum got all the thanks for helping to clean the toilets with us for handover, but for the past 2 yrs, who was the one who had been doing the daily maintenance so that cleaning at the end was not as terrifying? And the 'magic stone' our kind maintenance guy passed to us that more than halved the effort. Hurray! Mum's the best! Mum cleaned our house! I do feel bitter because I sowed, and someone else reaped. Still, to be honest, my MIL did help us a lot with clearing the cabinets out by dumping most of the things in there unless she wasn't sure if we still wanted those things.

Upsetting things aside, MR Liow found a new pair of the sunglasses his mum lost and is super elated! I'm happy for him too because he really loved that pair that went missing. And it was even cheaper than it was 2 yrs ago during Thanksgiving.

I bought the Bach Remedy for Baileys and Maen. Didn't manage to find the one for dogs and so had to use this on them. Everything else is the same about this formula except that this one for human has alcohol in it although very minimum. Will read up about it more before I do.

We left them for almost 12 hrs in the new hotel right after checking in. I had a bad feeling that either it's going to be messy in the room or we'll be finding a note informing us that our dogs have been barking badly or worse, have been taken to the rescue shelter coz we left them in the room for so long.

When we returned to the hotel, everything was perfect like this morning! The room was clean and they did their business in the toilet. Don't know if they barked but they greeted us silently (and excitedly) when we returned. Nothing was damaged due to separation anxiety, there was no mess. My darlings were perfect, again!

They never fail to brighten up my days when I'm affected by something else in life. They are angel, my angels. How am I ever going to remain sane without them?

Still the same

She sees something she thought of getting but was indecisive so she did not get it. At the end of the day when everyone's done (basically herself coz we really have nothing left that we are dying to buy. Moreover, we already have 4 luggages and 2 crates. We're trying to keep everything within our limit.), she suddenly asks to go back again the next day to get that something she did not get earlier.

Before that, Mr Liow had already suggested bringing the girls to the outlet after checking in to the next hotel the next day (if time allows). She was kind and said graciously: "We are a family, irregardless of how far, we should bring them here to have a look." To me, as long as the driver is not too tired, I'm ok.

Then towards the end of the day, she decided that since it's 2 hours drive, too far away, she should just go back to the outlet to get her own stuff and forget about the girls. Whatever happened to "we are a family?"

Some kind of selfishness is in-born...

Mr Liow sprained his neck and all she cared about was her own shopping. BUY BUY BUY AND BUY! She even wanted to get another luggage when Mr Liow kept saying that we have NO MORE SPACE in the car left for another luggage to the airport. But no, she wants to get one more to bring to Malaysia.

She dropped Mr Liow's favourite sunglasses but insisted she couldn't have lost it, til I suggested she probably dropped it accidentally (no it will never be her fault, unless maybe it was accidental) while searching for something in the bag. The sunglasses was from 2 yrs ago and he bought new lens for it recently. Now those lens are redundant (plus he's feeling the loss, you know, the loss one feels when u lose something u love or have been using for a long time?)

At the outlet today, Mr Liow went searching for the sunglasses but it was no longer being sold, at least not in that outlet store. The mum wasn't the least bit concerned. She was more concerned that she has no aircondition at home and busy sending smses to his sister to arrange for aircon man to fix the aircon on 21st June. We will arrive Singapore on 15th June. Is it too late to arrange for the repair then? No mention of his sprained neck, nor any guilt towards his loss and not being able to find the same one. All she said was: "I'll give you a treat lor." So sincere.

Once back, she got busy packing her stuff. Only after she's done with her own stuff did she remember Mr Liow had a sprained neck!! All of a sudden, she's a concerned mum again, asking him to rest, stop searching the Internet for places to bring the girls, offered to massage his neck (which she's not done till now). While asking Mr Liow to go offline as Mr Liow searched the web for the next nearest outlet, she started busy asking: "Is there Polo Ralph? How about Burberry?" I thought she was concerned that he rest? Not if it concerns her. If it doesn't, then Mr Liow better rest. Since he was trying to see if there's another outlet near our next hotel, she wants to know if there are any of her favourite stores. Who cares about ah girl being my family and all (like she so graciously suggested in the first place). No, IT'S ALL ABOUT HERSELF!

All because she wants to return to the outlet, she was gracious towards my family with kind words like: "If we can bring them here, bring them here lor." She sure is not feeling the same way now because she is a concerned mum (but only after we drive 1/2hr down for her to get her Burberry t-shirt and the extra distance to the nex hotel tomorrow). After that, she will be a concerned mum again. Why haven't she suggested that she will give Burberry a skip because Mr Liow is tired and in pain? BEcause she will not give it a miss!

Mr Liow has planned. I'll leave it to him. Seriously, she keeps yakking about herself being generous and self-giving and wonders why some people she knows cannot do as she does. Firstly, she just doesn't see that she's really much less noble than she thinks of herself. Secondly, she has a maid and plenty of time and money. She's wondering why people will not commit to community work and condemns them as being selfish. I wonder how many of those she's referring to, has a maid and plenty of time and money like she does. Just how many in her community is having as good a life as she is having?

We've passed tons of half-used household items to the new guy and wife. I thought there should be a limit because if we push too many things to them and none of them are useful, these things will only appear as junk to them.

She begged to differ. She says they ought to be grateful!

When I was asked what to do with the last pot left in our house on the last day, I suggested dumping it. It was oily and she said she was tired. Mr Liow was obviously tired out from all the driving around to pass things to people, packing and cleaning. AN wasn't ready to let me do anything out of her sight. I casually suggested dumping it BECAUSE NO ONE WANTED TO DECIDE and because it was dirty and everyone was too tired to wash it up.

Then she raised her voice and accused me of being wastful and dumping so much things, that the pot can still be used after a wash and that it's selfish to dump when we can pass it on etc etc. You know, I learnt my lesson from her that good doesn't always beget good. Now I'm being told off for being wasteful and selfish, after already given them lots of things.

Can anyone imagine how frustrating it is to have someone ask a question, no one dares decide, someone speaks up and then gets negative response wrt that suggestion? HEY, IF U HAVE AN IDEA, SPEAK UP! DON'T AMBUSH ME!

2 years ago, when we brought 2 bags of stuff to her home (only things she specifically wanted. NONE of anything she did not ask to have), she flared up at us and told us off for "chocking her place with garbage"! I learnt my lesson and was bewildered at how she did not know I was referring to her when I commented that there ARE ungrateful people like that. She said people like that do exist and they ought to be ashame. I don't think she is.

So I am the selfish one now.

Mr Liow, you really have to remember the reason why I rather act deaf and dumb in front of her. Why must I put myself in danger?

Can there be one who's this selfish, self-centred and yet so unaware of her own self? And one can unbashfully proclaim of herself as being generous, kind and magnanimous!

I made it a point to be blunt should I see her contradicting herself or if I do not agree. No more giving face. But I've not practiced well enough to do it yet. I probably won't be very nasty afterall.

I will not call her mum. Not because it slips my mind, not because I am too used to calling her something else, but because I have my own mother to call "mum" who's way less of a hypocrite.

92 Boxes

The boxes and odd sized items are finally out. Hehe. Final figure: 92 items!

We cleared out home at Singapore and left with 44 boxes. Let's see how we are going to squeeze 92 back in.

It's cleaning up for today and tomorrow and once ready, we'll return our keys.

The house is now near empty except for rubbish, documents, papers and snacks everywhere. It resembles almost the first few days we spent here. All those memories again.

AN spent 2/3 of her life here: she learnt to walk, think, speak and spent her knowing years in this house. It's no wonder she told us the same thing again, in the car just now: "we are going back to Singapore but I still prefer Tucson. I like it here."

First Night at La Quinta

This is our first night's stay at La Quinta, our first away from 'home' but not bEcause we are on a holiday.

Movers will come late morning tomorrow (hopefully after we reach 'home' to make sure all the boxes are sealed and everything that are supposed to be packed are all in.

Latest carton count: 54 boxes with 20 odd sized items. This is better than I expected. I thought we were going to hit 100 in total (we probably will if baby boy is born here). At least 1/5 of this shipment belongs to AN: toys and clothes.

Poor Mr Liow had another long day today. He got up at 7.30am to bring BM to the vet to get the health certs signed, drove 2 hours down to Phoenix's USDA office for export of animals, got a near cardiac arrest at being told our vet used a health cert for late animals instead of dogs but the kind officer approved the export anyway with a note indicating that it was a wrong form used but will not affect the export procedures in any ways (phew!!), waited over an hour for all the papers to be ready for collection, got caught in a terrible 2 hour jam, rushed back to office to orientate Derrick (the new guy), checked in to La Quinta and finally rushed back home in time to continue packing.

We sold the remaining of our furnitures (our sofabed from Sgp and a queen bed with divan and a bookcase for USD$115. hehe.) and then went out for dinner.

Mr Liow was drained by then but we had to continue packing after dinner. There were mirrors and other odd sized items that needed bubble wrapping due to their fragile nature and we spent the next few hours after that stuffing remaining items in unsealed boxes and wrapping fragile items.

Had wanted to stock up on BM's food but had no time at all to go get them. No choice then, we just have to get their food locally after they finish whatever we have left. Am glad Nature's Variety Instinct's Duck formula is available in Sgp (right??). I've stopped giving them Orijen. It's not doing them any good at all. Stools are constantly soft (and they poo A LOT while on Orijen) and they are constantly tearing wet tears. Coat doesn't appear to look better. So, no point carrying on.

2 more days and Tucson and that is the end of our journey in the "other side of the world". As I switched off the lights before leaving for the hotel a while ago, the heart felt heavy. I felt as if the house was sobbing for us to stay. One just cant help feeling emotional.

Will I cry when we lock the doors of our Sonoran Terrace townhouse in 2 days for the last time? I may, for all you know. *sob*

AN at 3 Years Old

"Adrielle is not going back to Singapore. Adrielle likes to be here in my house."

She's been watching us pack for the past month and accepting that some toys once packed and sealed, will not be taken out and played with till we reach. So, she's been selecting some that she particularly likes to be sealed up last and some that I've decided to bring with us in the luggage so that she does not have to wait 6-7 weeks before she sees them again.

And she's been telling people we meet that we are "going back to Singapore" and how things have to be sent back in boxes.

I think it was when Mr Liow was packing in the last few of her favourite toys when she finally had the last straw and commented: "Adrielle is not going back to Singapore" and that she likes her house here.

She DOES love it here in actual fact. There's so much freedom, so many things to see, and life for her here had been so carefree. She might not have understood it when I told her that she will have to go to school in Singapore but she repeated what I said to my MIL, saying: "When I go back to Singapore, I will have to go to school you know?"

And whenever we leave the house to get necessities these last few days, she will go: "Let's get (whatever she has in mind) for my little brother. He will need this in Singapore." My big girl has already asked to buy many toys for her little brother and surprisingly, she really mean them for him! She will try the toys out for a short while and insist we pack them in the boxes for him so that we do not forget to bring it back with us.

She complains about Baileys and Maen disturbing her (whenever they try to lick her) but when Baileys and Maen get rejected by others (be it guests or us), she jumps to their defence and says: "They just want to lick you, because they love you!"

I left a sleeping AN in the room while I went downstairs to pack BM's stuff a while ago, believing she will remain asleep till at least 3am or later (she doesn't sleep through the night but hardly wakes up at 1.30am too) and I could get some things done. It must be her cough and she DID wake up, sobbing badly and pleading on the steps: "Mummy, don't leave me upstairs! I don't like mummy to leave me alone upstairs." hehe.

She sounded so pitiful she made me feel terribly sorry I left her alone in a completely dark room with lots of stuff sprawled across the floor to be packed in the luggage. She could have tripped and fell while trying to find her way out of the room to look for me. My poor baby.

This girl has started to call her papa "Daddy" since months ago. We are still unsure why she decided to call him "dad" and sometimes "daddy" instead of "papa". Sounds endearing to me but Mr Liow prefers to be addressed "papa" but he did not bother to make her change how she's calling him. Our cheeky 3 yrs old has upgraded her own status and started calling us "dear dear" sometimes now. It's adorable when she calls us that (she calls her daddy "dear dear" more often than she calls me that but she does. Cute. Hehe.)

AN has lots of tricks and ideas up her sleeves, exactly like her daddy. I think she has his character (his resourcefulness and wits).

My MIL is enjoying AN to the max now that she's here. Mostly other than times when AN is extremely needy of me (when it's near nap or bedtime, during meals and when she needs to pee or poop), AN will stay beside granny so I can do some packing here and there. I'm sure my mum is drooling. She's dying to see AN again.

AN is an angel, our dear dear angel. There are times we wonder how she could be THAT unbelievably stubborn. At other times, she's pure joy to chat with and watch. Punishments for wrong behaviour is ncessary and I noticed correction seems to be taking place, finally. She is now willing to take steps towards me instead of stubbornly insist I go right next to her to bring her either up or down the stairs, even when I am busy or somewhere else. She realizes it's wrong to shout AFTER she's raised her voice or be rude and will come near to hug me.

To round it up, AN at 3 years old is a more exaggerated version of herself at two. If she was stubborn at 2, she is now doubly stubborn. She was sweet, attentive and compassionate at 2 and at 3 years old now, she is generous with hugs and concern for anyone who falls or is feeling unwell.

I hope she doesn't change too much when we go back. Not as if being in Singapore will change her character. I think I'm just tired. Hehe. Bed time again!

It's MORNING!

I've just finished my previous entry and am hearing bird chirping outside the house now!! Looking out, it's already dawn!! The birds are awake and so am I! I've not even fallen asleep yet and still am not a single bit sleepy.

Bad news.

I'll try closing my eyes for now.

LA Accomodation and transport settled

Time now is 4.15am.

Took us a while to finally settle our LA 'trip'.

We tried to find a hotel near the girls that also take dogs and found only a couple. They had no rooms with 2 double beds for the days we were to be there so we tried booking with a different check in date. Got a room to check in to from 11-13 June, but we will arrive on 10 June and need somewhere to stay with the dogs. Gosh it's tough finding a hotel/ inn that accept dogs at reasonable rates..

Since we will pass by Dessert Hill Outlet from Tucson to LA and since it is 1hr 56mins away from the girls' hotel PLUS slightly over an hour (to and from the nearest pet friendly hotel near them) should we go pick them up, we decided to get a hotel near the outlet for 10th June to rest for the day. We needed a place to stay anyway.

Mr Liow felt bad that we wouldn't be bringing the girls to Dessert Hill but it's really tough with that amount of travelling. If we were to stay near the girls, provided we can find another hotel that takes dogs (which we've been unable to....what is the occassion?? Dog shows??), we will have to travel 26mins to their hotel to fetch them, and then another 1hr 56mins to the outlet. Make it a to and fro trip and Mr Liow will have to drive 5hours both ways. It's going to be tiring for us all after these few days of hectic packing plus late nights and early mornings.

Sorry girls, if you happen to read this before we manage to speak to you all tomorrow. The nearest La Quinta is 26mins from Hollywood Historic minus traffic.

So we finally settled for the 2 La Quintas at different locations. Next up was car rental.

Most websites that we searched through had no more mini-vans for rental on the dates we needed one!! Sent us into a state of panic! The only car rental site that still had mini-vans for rent was renting each (with taxes and surcharges all in, plus the extra amount we have to pay for dropping the vehicle off in another state) was over $1k!

*faint*

We had almost no choice but to pay that amount till smart Mr Liow decided to try checking prices for collecting the car on different dates. True enough, after 2 hours, we found a mini-van that we can rent for less than $700 with all tax and extra charges included.

It's almost going to be sunrise by now. Mr Liow's guys will be coming over to our place to move our furnitures to the new colleague's (the one who's taking over Mr Liow) place at 9am, 4 hours from now.

Mr Liow is sound asleep, terribly tired out from these weeks of little sleep and packing plus handover/takeover stress at work. Me? Tired but sleepless.. I better catch some sleep before AN wakes up.

Mr Liow has to bring Derrick (the new coll) to office for the first time to help him familiarize a little in the afternoon after the move. He will be sending the furkids to be shaved down on his way.

Makes me feel so bad I wasn't able to be of much help to him and almost the entire transfer back to Singapore, every responsibility (packing, wrapping and even bringing the girls around while they were here) fell on his shoulders. Oh yes, cleaning up the house is no joke too.

Things have not been going according to plan and it makes him even more nervous with the tight schedule now.

Time to sleep now. We trust that the rest of what we have to get done, will be done on time and that there will be no more surprises, with the Lord in control.

We HATE AVA

We can't help hating AVA for their incompetence that has never improved over the years. We are not the only dog owners who feel this way I believe.

BM had their health checkup done this morning and we thought that was one item we can check off our list but NO!! AVA requires an internal parasite treatment for our dogs 4 days prior to export BUT on the form that the vet needs to fill up, it says the vet is signing to verify that he has seen and inspected the dogs and certify them fit to travel 7 days prior to export.

How can a vet sign saying he saw them 7 days before but parasite treatment to be administered 4 days prior export???

I had lots of trouble figuring out how to fill up the application for import permit as well. In one part, I was asked to fill up details of my dog/s. I was asked for the "Number of heads" which I assumed meant the number of dogs we have with us. I entered "2". But nowhere else on the same page was I able to include details of my second dog!

Did I have to fill up another form for a second dogs? What did they mean by asking about number of heads then? How many people get to keep a dog with 2 heads?

And I was supposed to indicate CITES I/II/III but there was no icon that I could click on to bring me somewhere to find out what is CITES I/II/III. I was totally clueless!!

Not to forget, Maen had been in Tucson for 5 months in Sept 2008 but my brother received a letter warning us to pay for her license renewal or face penalities. What?? We cancelled their license in March 08 before we came over! When Mr Liow called in, the staff rudely accused him of not informing them! Huh?? Do they not communicate internally within departments? We exported our dogs and licenses were cancelled and it was still our responsibility to call everyone in AVA to inform???? Not to forget the rudeness.

Thank God the lady in charge of our import this time is prompt and helpful, and knows her stuff well.

Just that existing AVA forms and procedures seriously need scrutinizing.

We are now stuck with the health cert.

We have to drive 2 hrs to Phoenix to get USDA to chop and approve the export but prior to that, the vet has to sign. But vet cannot sign because he did not administer the medications for internal parasites 4 days before BM leaves.

And we will be out of Tucson 4 days before flying back to Sgp. Moreover, the vet is supposed to sign acknowledging he saw them 7 days before export. What exactly does AVA want??

4 days??? How to get that to happen in 4 days??

And stupid AVA CLOSES ON WEEKENDS. We barely have time to ask exactly how it's supposed to be, bring them back to vet on Monday, speed all the way to Phoenix and hope BM do not get denied at the airport on 15th June.

Oh, WE have to inform the airport that our dogs will be arriving. AVA will not do it for us. And we have to pay $50 fo the import licEnse that showed less information than I spent hours trying to fill up. Only 2 sentences on their letterhead, to be precise.

Ridiculous.

And because the requirement for import exceeds a million words in AVA's guidelines that states a hundred things pet owners need to do to import their pets, BM were given additional rabies shots that was totally unneccessary, just so they do not have to be quarantined for 30 days.

We are not allowed to bring them to quarantine centre ourselves and are forced to pay domestic flight prices per dog to have them transported there. And after all those rabies shot taken here and blood tests done to ensure the rabies vaccine they took well remained in their bodies, they still need another rabies vaccine done when they reach.

Oh, putting 2 dogs together in one same room during quarantine cost the same as placing them in separate rooms. If not for the fact that they are inseparable, we'd rather make the money well spent by separating them so each gets more space.

Sigh...

Hate AVA. I hope we get to speak to someone tomorrow night which should b Monday morning in Sgp, just to see if we can give the pills for internal parasites on Monday instead of 10th June so that vet can endorse in time for us to bring to USDA Phoenix.

What do we pay AVA to do? Cull every homeless dog they see on the street. What is this coming to?? I hope BM never runs away from home else we will be the ones paying AVA to kill them if they meet on the streets one day without us around.

Can someone speak up for AVA so that we can understand them better?

Petty Squabble

Mr Liow's mum had been making our meals lately and Mr Liow did mention that he missed his mum's cooking once in a while before she came over.

Ok, AN loves vegetables and would not reject them at meals. She loves all sorts, from brinjal, greeny leafy ones and their stalk, string ones, flowery ones, and didn't mind them in whichever colour.

That lunch, Mr Liow asked his mum how she made her brinjal so soft. She said to just cook it longer. Mr Liow then commented that 'we' could never get it as soft as that and emphasized that he had never seen AN enjoy brinjal like this time.

I felt offended in the beginning! Firstly, she bought eggplant that was anothr species of brinjal that would not cook to the tenderness of brinjal. This 'brinjal' dish was tougher to chew up than the usual. Secondly, AN loves brinjal. She can finish as much brinjal as I make if she didn't have to eat rice with it.

Thirdly, my MIL's prideful reply wasn't pleasing as well. She said: "Judy don't know how to make, nevermind. When you come back to Singapore, I'll make it for you all."

For all my efforts put in making meals for the past 2 yrs, this was the "thank you" that I got, a subtle suggestion from my husband that he was just tolerating my cooking to go back to mum's, that my daughter didn't enjoy my cooking as well as she enjoyed grandma's.

-_______-"

That was just a passing moment of feeling offended though. I knew AN enjoyed my vege dishes better because she would rather eat the food I cook and if she had enough of her food, she would only be left with plain rice. That day, she had problems chewing the eggplant and spinach and swallowing them, and had a large portion left that she gave up eating. I loved my own vegetable dishes much better as well, so I wasn't too affected at the end of the conversation.

I whispered to AN in front of Mr Liow, loud enough for him who was sitting at the table with us to hear, that I prefer my own cooking and so am not going to feel 'beaten'. AN then whispered back asking: "Mummy, why are you whispering?"

I replied softly with a palm over her ears: "bcause I don't want papa to hear us."

Our angel who never likes us to argue then loudly asked in shock: "why does mummy not want papa to hear us??!!"

That made us laugh. We can't trust AN with secrets at this age. Imagine what could have happen if I was whispering something worse to her. Hee.

Seriously, I am fully aware my skills have improved over the years and I am confident. I do not make the best dishes but I have tasted better cooking than my MIL's (Isabelle for one wins her hands down).

I also understand it's not surprising a child often prefers mum's cooking to others, just like I always prefer my mum's over MIL's (before mum turned 'less salt less oil')

I can make fantastic dishes with MSG too, but do I need to subject my family to it?

So I can't make Mr Liow agree my dishes taste better than his mum's because he grew up eating food the way she made it.

We're ok now. Ok the minute AN made us laugh. Hee.

Final Days

It's Mr Liow's last day at work today.

The girls (ah girl and TPF) who arrived on 12th May will be heading to LA tomorrow night before we do.

Sunday will be our last day in Sonoran Terrace before we shift into La Quinta Inn on Monday (7th June).

We will still be going back to pack and clean up. Boxes will be out on Tues (8th June), house to hand over back to management on Wed (9th June) and then we will leave Tucson for LA on Thurs (10th June).

We have from 11th (Fri) - 13th (Sun) in LA and will then take our Eva Air flight back to Singapore in the early hours of 14th June (0100hrs of Monday) and arrive 1200hrs on 15th June (Tues).

We have just labelled our 30th carton with at least 10 that's in the room the girls are now sleeping in that are not labelled. Mr Liow has already counted at least 20 odd sized items. So, we will have at least 40 cartons with 20 large boxes, 6 - 7 weeks after we arrive Singapore.

We're now left with arranging to collect health documents from BM's vet and AN's Dr Bean, arranging to get to Phoenix for BM's export permit... and I think we will be ready.

2 years flies. In fact, it's been more than 2 years since we arrived here.

On one hand, we have so much to miss about this place but another side of me cannot wait to leave. I just want to get out of this messy house filled with cartons as soon as possible.

From Mon onwards, I may not be have time online. So, we'll see you guys back in Singapore and to our Tucson friends, goodbye in advance before we greet you all again in abt 10 days time.

Confusing the child

Incident 1
What a parent does not need when disciplining a misbehaving child is to have a grandparent walk into the room used for time out, in the midst of time out, to hug and tell the child: "granny loves you. Don't cry."

As if that was not enough, granny had to tell the parent off in front of the misbehaving child not to do that (put the child in the room for time out). Granny thinks time out will scare the child and stops the parent from doing what is necessary.

Do that a few more times and I will end up with a child that's resistant to discipline because she will soon realise someone will back her up.

What is granny trying to do? Prove to the vulnerable child that mummy doesn't love her and that granny is the best??

You may think granny feels heartache but from how I see it, for someone who spanks her other grandkids except this one, so badly the teacher in school had to call the mum of the child up to ask about unexplainable bruises on that the child who couldn't stop crying in class, one can hardly see compassion in a disciplinarian like that to be able to feel sorry for a child who's simply being punished with time out instead of being punished physically.

How more offending can it be when granny simply walks into the room without a word to soothe the screaming child and tells the mum off in front of the child when it was discipline time....

Incident 2
AN had been coughing since more than a week back. And since then, granny was around. She keeps telling us not to give AN ice (AN loves to crunch on ice) and cold water. We do not offer her ice and controls how much we give her, if she asks for it. Only after I hear her coughing lesser in the night, I will relax my control the next day. No one else hears her cough at night, maybe because I'm the one sleeping right beside her and I'm a light sleeper (trained since AN was born).

But granny also practises double standard.

She asks if AN wanted to buy sweets and AN said yes of course. Without asking me, she grabbed a pack of tic-tac and wanted to get it for AN. I stopped her and reminded her that AN is still coughing and I would prefer to stop her from eating sweet & sugary stuff till she gets better. (What is wrong with cold water and ice as compared to sweets when a child a coughing??)

AN then started to act up saying that granny says she can have sweets.

I reminded AN that she's still coughing but she wouldn't hear me and insisted granny said ok.

Granny then told her gently: "Granny say can BUT MUMMY SAYS CANNOT. Be good ok?" (Oh good!!! Mummy is the bad guy now. Granny is good.)

Incident 3
AN was offered a pack of gummy at a supermarket (only Mr Liow, AN and I went grocery shopping that day). She wanted to open it up but we said no and she did not persist in asking to have any. She held the pack of gummies in her hands, wanting to show granny when we get home.

Once we got home, she excitedly showed granny what she was given. Granny then asked if she wanted one and attempted to open the packet for her.

AN was fast enough to tell granny (which I was quite glad AN actually understood that she has to recover before we will give her anything that's not helping her recover): "No I cannot eat this because I am still sick."

Granny then encouraged her: "One is ok." (OH MY .......)

AN then insisted no and I had to step in to remind my MIL that AN IS STILL COUGHING!!!!

AN upon seeing my reaction, then tried to coax me into giving one to her saying: "Granny says I can have one."

Mr Liow was around and insisted that she can have one only after she recovers but by then, AN was in no mood for negotiation.

Granny then stooped low and told her: "Granny says can but daddy says cannot. Listen to daddy ok. Granny loves you." (Do I hear another affirmation that granny loves her and will give her anything but not daddy and mummy?).

Mr Liow took her out to talk to her but ended up giving her one. AN settled for one and did not ask for more.

How powerful and confusing for a child when adults in the house do not agree on the same conditions, isn't it?

And how convincing in times like these, when one tells a young kid: "I love you but someone else says you cannnot have it." that a child will come to associate granny as the nice person and her parents being the evil one who will not give her good things.

Wrong wrong wrong...

I started out with only 1 incident and thought I could just ignore and forget about it but for the past 2 days, it keeps happening.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Last time she came in 2008, she quietly gave AN a cup of popcorn (a generous sample portion offered by the popcorn man) and fed her while I was not looking. She sheepishly admitted that she gave AN popcorn when I saw her feeding AN. I was ok with it. I just didn't want her to have too much sugary stuff. Other snacks are fine with me.

But what I was concerned with was, what was my MIL thinking when she gave AN the popcorn SECRETLY (pick one out from the bag and hurriedly pop it into AN's mouth). AN was not sick then, she was not throwing tanthrums, it was just another normal day of shopping. Did she think I wouldn't give AN popcorn because:

i. I do not think popcorn is good for AN
ii. I do not want AN to grow up being happy

If it's point (i), why would she then go ahead to give AN popcorn if it's not good for AN? I suppose she's more convinced that I might not agree to give AN popcorn because I am just not going to be happy with a happy toddler??

I do not understand her mentality. It's probably natural of grandparents to want to spoil their grandchildren and it's no wonder why most grandkids adore their grandparents more.

But to spoil the child by ALWAYS reminding them: "Daddy/ Mummy says no but granny says yes" and then adding: "granny loves you" instead of "your parents love you" is just planting very wrong thoughts in the young child that her parents do not love her because they are not allowing her to have things, even if it's for the right reasons.

Die liao.....this is what is going to happen ALL THE TIME once we go back. Praying for wisdom to deal with this issue. I've never spoken up to her when I do not agree but I am not going to keep silent about confusing my kids regarding our love for them.

Thank God Mr Liow agrees and has been assuring me that we will be firm about disciplining AN our way.

All these possible conflicts...